Tag Archives: eczema

Dear Dairy: A Warning Letter

13 Apr

Dear Dairy,

Please don’t make me do it.  Do not make me break up with you.  Please do not be the reason for my son’s eczema, because I be forced to end our almost 32 year relationship.  I thought things were going so good between us.  But frankly–it’s not me, it’s you.  You, apparently, could be contributing to my Little Man’s super dry and scaly neck, his red knees, his red and bumpy elbows. 

You have one week to shape up.  One week for me to empty out my fridge of all of your delicious goodness.  One more week of the best breakfast ever (cottage cheese, banana nut cheerios, raw almonds, and cinnamon).  One more week of your cheesy goodness.  If Little Man is still eczema-riddled, I will be forced to quit you.  Don’t worry, I will not cheat on you with any of those other “milks”.  You know–rice, almond, soy.  But there will be no break-up sex.  I am telling you right now, you will not be welcomed back into my open bowl, glass, mug, salad, burger for at least another 6 months. 

Heed my warning, Dairy.  This is no idle threat.  I do not want to do it, but I will.  Because Little Man is way more important to me than all your wonderful-ness.  I do not know what I will eat for breakfast.  I do not know what I will do all summer long without you topping my burgers.  But I have been through break-ups before.  And I will be OK. 

I will always love you,


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